Saturday, May 31, 2008

Who Is This Creature?!

I have never encountered anyone who could stir me from one extreme of thought and feeling to the other so ferociously! I have not even had a real conversation with this creature! And yet, there are times I want to yell in anger and frustration, and other times, I want to bask in the comfort and wisdom expounded. Who is this creature that stirs me so?! I want to know, yet I am not sure that I do.

I am not inspired by very many, in fact, I can count the number of people that have offered any inspiration to my life on one hand. 1..2..3..4...And with so few people able to stir my heart and mind, you would think that I would be quite resistant to include this creature to my list! Yet, there it is!! Inspired to do better, to aim higher, to love deeper....-----!

My prayer life has become very animated at times because of this creature...challenging me to draw all the truth of who I am out of my heart! The nerve!!! OI!

Does this creature have ANY CLUE WHATSOEVER as to the effect it is having on me??? Doubt it.

Who is this creature? I will tell you who this creature is....

The creature is only the vessel, it is its obedience to Ruach Qodesh that stirs my soul, that I can not ignore. I am drawn closer to who I am and who I am to be. This is a struggle, it should probably be less of one because I am a warrior - a regal warrior at that. I can not, I will not shrink back - I am called, regardless of the intensity of the battle...

The reality is, facing who I am - who I am to be, is intimidating at times. Sometimes I feel lonely in this spot, other times, strong and fearless. That is why this creature bothers me so...he has no idea how he is being used by our Father, oblivious to his impact on me a world away...and I can't tell him to stop...he wouldn't listen anyway. He is called to be who he is called to be; I respect that.

Why do I subject myself to his influence? Because, I am on a quest and he happens to be the vessel I need to drink from...he is also the vessel I am called to carry.

No comments:

Featured Post

They Did Not Realize

Early in the morning, Jesus stood on the shore, but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus. ~John 21:4